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Today’s TL;DR post presented in four parts.

05/04/2012

Find below an outline for the post so that you can better navigate this week’s installment of bilge:

In part 1, I lament my egregious inability to respond to comments.

In part 2, I display hypochondriacal tendencies.

In part 3, I bore everyone with my life plans.

In part 4, I declare that I will take the month “off” (ish) from running (not really, but kind of).


Part 1. I assume no one has noticed this, but since I have a habit of calling attention to even my most inconsequential deficiencies and apologizing for them, let’s plow ahead and do it:

I have become a complete thug about replying to comments. I read every single one (you know, all three) through email and love them all and think, “Oh, that person is so cool! What an insightful point! What a good idea! What a funny comment! Let’s be best friends!” or whatever and remind myself to go reply and then I completely drop the ball and two weeks have passed and I still haven’t acknowledged them and it’s become awkwardly late to reply because the internet is all about instant interaction so I am a failure. This has been the pattern for about my last four posts.

So, please do not feel as if you have to read or comment upon this asshattery. Also, do you nuts really want me to join twitter, or am I secretly the butt of some twitter joke I don’t know about? I can’t tell. Either way, it should be blindingly apparent that I suck at the internet.

 

Part 2. Ever since I got sick back in March, I have been feeling like Garbage (yes, capitalized). At first the garbagey feeling was limited to running, but it has spread into regular life as well, and I wake up every day feeling foggy, terrible, and pining for the next opportunity to lie down. I initially attributed this nonsense to the changing of seasons, but as April yielded no improvements it is now worth mulling over potential causes for my continued sluggishness:

1. I didn’t take any downtime after that 10K PR. Instead, I resumed my running routine without even thinking about it. Looking back, that was perfect timing for a break.

2. I have nothing to train for. In the past I was not a huge “trainer” for races and I sort of just moseyed around, but I’ve come to depend on the sense of purpose and direction a goal race affords me.  With nothing compelling on the horizon race-wise, keeping my mileage up is feeling pointless, which probably contributes to feeling so eghghhhlslh.

3. My thyroid is being a fool. My senior year of high school, I had thyroid surgery to remove a suspicious lump. The surgery was easy and the lump turned out to be benign, but in the year and a half following, I felt like twelve tons of awful until we figured out a dosage of thyroid replacement hormone/vitamin D that helps me be a functional human. Sometimes that stuff gets mysteriously messed up again and I feel crummy for awhile, which might be what is going on now.

4. I am a hypochondriac completely overthinking a normal pattern of fatigue.  Truthfully, this might all be in my head.

 

Part 3. So I’m still leaving this open, but for right now the tentative plan is to head to Philadelphia  (…hi flo!) for school this fall.

Isn’t it odd how you can be content to keep doing what you’re doing until you make a decision that throws your whole outlook into a new focus?

Ever since I submitted my intent to enroll form, I have been itchy to move on from this town. Work is getting semi-stressful with conflicting schedules to juggle and I am operating at maximum office troll capacity with all the blood-pressure-spike-phone-ringing and it’s back to raining all the time so as shooting-a-gift-horse-in-the-maw as this sounds, I find myself eagerly anticipating life after Juneau.

New running routes, and studying things again, and (call me crazy, but) writing papers! YES. I don’t care what anyone says, I am thrilled about the prospect of trading in answering phones for researching/writing papers/doing projects. Let some other fresh-out-of-undergrad sucker be the one to lick all the envelopes and adlib answers to all the befuddling questions people ask over the phone!

Maybe after graduate school I will even manage to secure a full-time job instead of three part-time ones. Or, oh. Maybe I will be unemployed and several K in debt.

Someone tell me to settle down. You know in four months I’m going to be six-cylinder whining about school being stressful and life being lonely and Philadelphia being packed with concrete and traffic lights.

I guess all I’m trying to say is, I’m looking forward to it.

 

Part 4. I’m taking a break from my usual running routine this week for a few reasons:

1. As detailed above, I’ve been feeling physically and mentally wrecked and want to give things a chance to right themselves.

2.  I want the mental stimulation of something new and the opportunity to do something else — like erg. Until today, I hadn’t touched an erg in months. I am horrifically out of rowing shape, but the prospect of moving to Philly — Boathouse Row! The Schuylkill! —  makes me entertain the idea of revisiting team rowing. Although I probably won’t, because rowing is expensive and running is just easier, life-wise.

3. I felt myself getting a little neurotic about hitting certain miles each week, and I don’t want to be chained to that. I’m not training for anything right now so there’s no reason to be mileage hogging. Higher mileage is fine and dandy when it’s fun and you look forward to it, but the second it starts feeling like a chore, no thanks, let’s avoid the whole mental burnout and/or compulsive exercise thing.

 

Anyway, happy Friday. This weekend, I am pet-sitting for two high-maintenance-yet-fantastic hunting dogs and a spatially-challenged cat. One of the dogs has to run on the treadmill every morning and evening for a total of 5-6 miles daily. I mean, what. Animals are hilarious.

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15 Comments leave one →
  1. 05/04/2012 12:48

    We really want you to join twitter.

    I haven’t even gotten past that point yet but I had to comment already.

    • 05/04/2012 12:49

      In fact, let me help: twitter.com/account/new

    • 05/04/2012 12:51

      Okay, now I’ve read the rest. Congrats on Philly! I lived there for, uh, 7? years and I loved the city. I’m like 94% sure I’ll be running the Philly Marathon this fall – yay! (Of course, you’re welcome to day/weekend trip up to NYC any time you want and stay with me.)

  2. 05/04/2012 13:08

    I’m the exact same kind of comment-non-replying thug. But I have a better reason: on blogger, nobody gets notified when you reply to their comments, so nobody benefits from my pearly words of reply. Also, I only want to be best friends with 1/2 of the people who comment. Kidding.

    Go Philadelphia! What a transition. I guess I missed my opportunity to go running snow shoes and watch glaciers with you in Alaska. Did I stereotype that correctly?

  3. sarah permalink
    05/04/2012 13:09

    Yes, of course we want you to join twitter. We’ve been bitching about you not being on twitter for a year. Join the new world, gramma.

  4. 05/04/2012 14:37

    Philly will be exciting! I was holding out for Montana ;-) Hope the running break helps clear the fog!

  5. RunningFarce permalink
    05/04/2012 18:35

    I have a twitter account that does nothing but collect dust. I’m nosy enough to like to see what everyone else is up to, but I don’t like to sit at the computer more than I have to and have also avoided the smart phone frenzy thus far.

    • RunningFarce permalink
      05/04/2012 18:35

      I think avoiding Twitter is a noble fight

  6. 05/04/2012 20:24

    feeling like garbage aside, you give me hope that my lack of a thyroid isn’t going to destroy me forever. i’m 9 months out and while i’m totally functional in everyday life, i can definitely see/feel the fact that i am (STILL) hypo in my running. hoping that a massive med increase will fix this, because i’m getting a little annoyed with being slow and apathetic.

    philly! fun! gotta love the east coast. what are you heading to grad school for? as an aside i never realized how much i enjoyed twitter until this semester, when my classmates and i mainly used it to bitch to each other about school. it’s pretty fun that way…

  7. Ewen permalink
    05/05/2012 02:39

    I forgive your egregious inability to respond to comments.

    Philly sounds like a good move — it’s the city of brotherly love after all. Flo’s running routes sound pretty cool and it’s an easy train ride up to NYC for races in Central Park.

    My one tip for Twitter would be don’t be too quick to follow people back. Wait and see what their tweeting habits are. If they tweet 20 times a day (not including replies) they’ll overwhelm your timeline.

    • 05/05/2012 17:07

      I’LL OVERWHELM YOUR TIMELINE WITH AWESOME.

      • 05/06/2012 18:55

        I’LL OVERWHELM YOUR TIMELINE WITH MEDIOCRITY. But isn’t that the point of twitter? ALSO, I got very excited when I realized that you must make Catherine Ndereba your new training partner.

  8. 05/05/2012 19:56

    You are great. Don’t apologize to the blog-world. We’ve all got enough going on in day-to-day without needing to be burdened with guilt, remorse, etc about the blog. (Though I sometimes feel badly when I fail to post promised updates or pictures or what not.) I suppose it’s just about balance. :-)

    Good luck with the treadmilling dog. And the moving plans. And yeah – get on twitter. Though I never sit down at a computer to tweet, only quick stuff from my phone. I think otherwise it would be too putzy for me.

  9. 05/06/2012 10:05

    I love your blog! You actually have witty/funny things to say, whereas I generally ramble on about how I’m thinking about definitely, maybe going to go to the track possibly tomorrow and then whine about school work for three paragraphs. (Oh yeah, school? Papers? Coming from someone in the midst of finals week, it’s definitely less fun than you remember.) But Philly is a cool place! Plus, I bet it’ll be nice to run in a place that isn’t snowy and wintry for six months out of the year.

  10. 05/10/2012 04:28

    Meh, I don’t think you need to apologize for not responding to comments. Sometimes this whole maintaining a blog thing just doesn’t fit into where you are in life. That doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t write, there will always be a ton of suckers like me who enjoy your writing style and will read whether you respond to us or not. :-P

    Sounds exciting that you are headed for Philly next. Do you have Steamtown on your marathon radar yet? You almost have to do that while you’re living within driveable distance!

    I don’t blame you for looking forward to going back to school. I definitely thought that grad school was fun. It is pretty much the only socially acceptable reason to take a two (or more) year break from the workforce to sleep late, do long runs in the middle of the day, and maintain the most flexible schedule possible.

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